Thursday, June 30, 2005 | By: Unknown

In the Nation's Capital, Baseball and Politics are one in the same...

This story has two of my favorite topics..politics and baseball...only thing is..those two should NEVER be in the same sentence...never..they should have nothing to do w/each other..but they do in DC...which is so wrong on many levels...those fucktards in charge, namely the Repub's are at it again folks..making threats to Major League Baseball, who owns the Washington Nationals..aka the Gnats...telling them whom they can or cannot sell the team to, or at least trying like hell..I am not saying the minority ownerMr. Soros, that the article speaks about is a great choice..but he IS a minority owner and christ, lots of baseball owners are thugs in every sense of the word, I mean..really...he wants to legalize medicinal pot..big fucking deal...I think they hate that he contributed 5 MIL to defeat bush more, but who can say for sure..the link is embedded in the title..there is a test later..
Wednesday, June 29, 2005 | By: Unknown

Thought for today...

There are no secrets, only information you don't yet have...

Adam Curry, former MTV VJ, now a budding podcast heavyweight.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005 | By: Unknown

aw..bobbie..come on john..take this one..please... Posted by Hello

Tagged by the everpopular Shellubra

The “rules” go like this:Remove the blog at #1 from the following list and bump every one up one place; add your blog’s name in the #5 spot; link to each of the other blogs for the desired cross pollination effect.
1. A Perfect Marriage
2. Married in Ohio
3. Queen of Pink
4. Shellubra
5.Moments in Time

Next: select new friends to add to the pollen count. (No one is obligated to participate).The five people I choose are:

Fantastic Alice
Jenn (Jenius)

And finally answer this question: What five things do you miss about your childhood.
1. The house we lived in on the mouth of the Susquehanna River in upper Maryland. I went to a two room schoolhouse, we lived in a very rural area and I was between the ages of 5-7.
2.My horse I had for a very short time. He was an appy named Chester and he was a gelding. I didnt own a saddle so if i couldnt borrow one i rode bareback. My dad sold him and kept the cash. He was given to me by an elderly neighbor who i used to excercise him for.
3.My summers at my paternal grandparents.
4.Listening to baseball games on the radio with my paternal grandfather.
5.I became an adult at 7 so basically i miss my childhood between the ages of 5-7 when i played as a child and dreamed as a child.

Here is Leroy, in his favorite sleeping spot..i do not have the heart to throw it the consternation of the ball and chain.. Posted by Hello

This is Patty..she is obviously very tired from playing...I think she looks like a friggin hamster in this picture..cept them big ears.. Posted by Hello
Monday, June 27, 2005 | By: Unknown

Widen your vocabulary 101:Fucktard

I have become aware of a new word circulating in the blog world and probably the REAL world as well...FUCKTARD....The word is so much more politically correct than say, oh i don't know..ok i DO know..retard..which has the ability to offend intelligent people and rightfully so in some circumstances..fucktard is of course derived from the word retard but it goes down easier than retard..but it makes the same point which is fantastic..someone is a worthless, mind-numbingly pathetic piece of dog excrement. The word fucktard can be used in as many forms as retard too..when your loved one pulls a real bone head move and sheepishly looks at you knowing full well you are aware of what he/she just did..thats a fucktard..when your forced to deal with individuals whose group IQ is equivalent to a used orange peel...those are fucktards...I am sure most of you are following my line of thinking here..if your not, then you must live in bakersfrigginfield....but anyway. i always appreciate a new word for my limited vocabulary..fucknut is one of my favorites, assclown a close second..I think fucktard is going to break out of the gate in first, like a good single on the charts..
Sunday, June 26, 2005 | By: Unknown

Baseball News

The yank$ avoided their first ever sweep at the hands of the OTHER NY team the mets none other than Jason "roid boy" Giambi..hey..even a blind squirrel finds the occasional nut ya' lets start with the AL East..

The Boston Red Sox, john's favorite target, are now leading their division which by the way is the same division as the yank$..their lead is 3.5 games over the Orioles..poor birds..they have tanked horribly..but i warned you they were not for real sportsfans..

The AL Comedy Central is still being led by the Chicago White 9.5 games..they did lose to the Cubbies today, Prior took the mound for the cubbies after his second stint on the Disabled List this young season...

The AL West is still Angels territory. The Anaheim/LA/Cali boys swept the hated Dodgers this weekend..thanks boyz..i appreciated it..the Texas Rangers lost a little ground in their bid to take over first, they are now 6.5 games back. Good thing our girl Daisy is out of the country, her beloved Kenny Rogers got rocked this week. 2 of the 4 teams are still playing less than stellar baseball and are below .500 in wins..although the A's did sweep the Giants this weekend i think..

The National League East finds the Washington Gnats still in first but the Braves who are being led by that geriatric ol fart Bobby Cox have won 9 of their last 10 games and are closing in fast on the Nats and/or Gnats...maybe Bobby is taking the new experimental drug they are testing for alzheimers patients..we can only hope sportsfans..

The NL Comedy Central still has those birds in St. Louis on top, the Cardinals..this sucky division still has 4 of the 6 teams playing disgusting ball, under .500 which means my 21 year old neice can probably hit better than most of those overpaid fucktards on the Brewers, Pirates, Astros and Reds.

Last but certainly not least we have the NL West...Padres are still atop the division by a slim margin of 3.5 games over the Diamondbacks..the hated Dodgers are reeling from the cornholing they received at the hands of the Angels this weekend..sweeps are such fun when the dodgers are the team being swept...makes me just want to jump up and rub it in the ball and chains face soooooooo bad...but i wont..he's not feeling well this evening..

The All Star game will be held July 14th..the voting as usual is so far off base ..its a bigname vs. deserving player thing. Fans do not have a clue when it comes to voting for the teams in both divisions..they seem to go on name recognition only..thats the only way that fairy Mike Piazza could make it into the All Star game..he is SO NOT the best catcher for the National League this year..he isnt even close for gods sake..Carlos Beltran doesn't deserve a nod either but hes got the most votes so he's going..fucker..And Scott Rolen for the cards should be sitting at home watching too because he just spent like a freaking month on the DL..but NOOOOOO the fans voted his happy ass in also..the game is in an American League Park this year..and remember folks..this one is least it is according to that fucktard of mythic purportions..Buddy boy Selig..

We leave for home tomorrow morning..its been fun in Vegas for three days but I have to get home to the herd of animals currently taking my name in vain since my son is NOT giving them treats or canned food..evidently its way too much work to use the electric can opener...

Republicans taking a shot at the Endangered Species Act..again..

Alrighty..yes I could be considered a "tree hugger" lets get that out of the way first..surely it colors my view of the world and its inhabitants..with that said I would like to point you to a recent article in, what else, the NY Times regarding the Bushies and their attempt to weaken the Endangered Species Act. The Bushies have already been systematcally tearing apart the Clean Air and Water Act, so much in fact that the courts have had to step in and slap the bastards on the wrists with a ruler on several occasions...the one thing that the Bushies and NO one else can change is this..once its gone..its gone forever...a plant, a habitat and species..those things can not be undone when they are gone from the face of the earth..that is why i say err on the side of protecting can build your friggin houses down the road in the next county, you can drill for your oil a few miles down the latitude and longitude lines..i use the universal 'YOUR"only for arguement purposes..big business is the major whiner when it comes to preserving animals or habitats for them. If we lived in a country like Japan where they live in tiny boxes because they have run out of room then perhaps there would be a need to reconsider our options..but we dont..and even japan has a certain level of preservation of animal species and/or habitats..i am not really well versed on japan so I do not want to expound on them any further..i just feel the need to vent about the Bush Administrations' efforts to change laws that are effective merely for the purpose of serving big business interests..yes i think the "economic impact" arguement should be considered but as in all things, emotional issues will cloud even the most simplistic needs..if you cut away the bullshit and the rhetoric, the bottom line we take care of the planet first or do we give in to the greedy self serving interests of big business and change the ecosystem forever for a particular species which has very little left in the way of options..both sides of this arguement are vocal and logical for the most just depends on who's logic you believe...its like a statistical analysis class..statistics can be bent to show anyones point if your good enough at doing it..just remember this one thought..Bush's administration in a recent court challenge to their wholesale slaughter of some large plot of land,attempted to call a "dam" a natural part of the landscape..i shit you not..they did..all i can say is this..Only if the fucking beavers built it assholes..
The link as per usual is embedded in the title of the post..enjoy..
Saturday, June 25, 2005 | By: Unknown

Ah Vegas....

I was SO looking forward to this trip, I had worked my ass off the prior week which is so totally unlike my lazy back was killing me, my asthma was acting up i was generally falling a-fucking-part..

There are 14 wildfires currently burning in this part of the state...the smoke is so thick it looks like fog. It smells like a fucking BBQ everytime you go outside cuz a shitload of mesquite is burning out there in the friggin desert. This kinda wreaks havoc on my already irritated lungs..

This is the ONLY place I wear a robe this time of year because the ball and chain keeps the room cold enough to hang MEAT in it. I woke up at 5 fucking 30 because my nose was was the only exposed part of my body, the rest was huddled under the covers. I turn the temp UP to 65 and the fan on low...just cuz its free doesnt mean you have to use the shit out of it i have tried to explain to the b&c..The humidity is so low, around 8%, that my hair looks like a friggin fright wig and I think I saw a couple of small children pointing at me and grabbing their mothers in terror....I am constantly putting lip balm on and my skin resembles alligator hide unless I lather on half a bottle of body lotion every 2 hours. The toilet paper in this fucking room is rough..i think you could use it in place of 40 grit sandpaper to take off old varnish on your favorite antique table..

Now..normal people just might be wondering..why is this bitch on the INTERNET in vegas??? Thats a very easy explanation..I come here very often and gambling is not that big of a deal to me plus I now haul water instead of alcohol in the cooler since I am old, fat and not in the best of health for the most part...its a bitch getting old...Reallly though I come over for the music and this trip was no exception..Eric Johnson and THE Buddy Guy were fantastic and worth every red cent I paid for that overpriced ticket. Oh yeah...JOHN...I NOW HAVE A BUDDY GUY T-SHIRT TOO..NEENER NEENER..and I did have "somewhat" of a buzz when I called you during that ridiculous Yank/Mets game..hahaha..PEDRO won..and i know you are SO hating that fact.. :)

Now I also need to be able to set my lineups for my 13 fantasy baseball teams..this might seem a tad overkill to most folks..13 teams is alot of work, but its my hobby and fuck anyone that doesnt understand my obsession with fantasy sports..I play the odds that with that many teams I should be able to come away with at least ONE fucking prove my prowess and knowledge is on the same level as most of the men I know regarding all things sports..well..its not quite working out as I had planned...

At least half my baseball teams are at or hovering around the bottom of the standings..this in and of itself is fodder for endless amounts of ribbing for most of the people I play against. I have been playing against these people for about six years and I know most of them fairly well. We talk major shit on the message boards in alot of the leagues..and since I AM a bitch I have no problem shooting off my mouth at the beginning of the season. So, basically I am the "village idiot" in most circles this season..oh well, such is life..

So thats how my grand weekend is going..its a weekend away from the "kids" and yes Alice i have a babysitter for them, its called MY SON, but since hes a self-centered jackass there is a backup babysitter one of my neighbors that understands my attachment to all my animals..i do miss the kittens though..but not THAT bad..i call brian at least twice a day to ask if he's fed them and to make sure they are all accounted for.. I get to drink all the Grey Goose I want for free, I can watch ANY sporting event I choose since we know all the bartenders and its a great people-watching excursion..not bad i would beats sitting at home any day...

Friday, June 24, 2005 | By: Unknown

Off to see Buddy Guy in Vegas..

We leave in about an why am i online? The b&c thinks i am writing a report..and this way I get HIM to clean all the cat boxes..nice huh?

see you guys monday evening..have fun, safe sex and above all else, keep an eye on John for moi..that man can get into trouble easier than anyone I know..(wink wink)
Thursday, June 23, 2005 | By: Unknown

Blog o' the day...

I love kitten, she's bright, funny and an animal lover..check out her blog if your so inclined..the post about buying the house is a goodie..and the reprint dated friday june 17th is hysterical..
Wednesday, June 22, 2005 | By: Unknown

The Care and Feeding of 12 animals..a how-to manual..

Doesn't matter if I am working or not, my day starts at 5:45 am..some animal has to go out and pee..usually its one of two dogs..Sasha or Baby. Nicky the cranky poodle can hold it longer than any dog i have ever known. Sasha is the hyper we-dont-know-what-the-hell-kinda dog she is that usually wakes me..she does try to wake the b&c..i have seen her try but he is oblivious to the world..someone could fudge pack that sumbitch and he wouldnt wake up..anyways..ALL 8 inside and 4 outside animals are on red alert soon as they hear my voice and/or morning cough...for the only thing that matters this side of kisses and hugs..FOOD..

So i let two of the three dogs out..Tabby, an orange feral male i have been caring for since he was a tiny kitten is sitting on the front steps waiting for me..he stretches and yawns..guess he sleeps there. He is the 0nly remaining member of an original group of four kittens..i go rustle up some dry food for him and put it in his bowl..if I am feeling really magnanimous which i usually do, he gets some canned dogs dont bother him and he doesn't pay attention to them. He lets me get within a foot of him now..its taken over a year for him to trust me that much..which is fine by me..the more he fears people the longer he will make it in this world..we got some real assholes in this neighborhood that kill ferals for fun..yeah..such a sporting thing to do ya fuckers..anyways..the kittens are up now and sitting around my feet looking up and squeeking..they dont meow yet..they squeek..its funny even at 6am..they sound like fucking little plastic toys i used to have for my son's bathtime when he was a wee lad...the dogs take their time peeing..i have to bellow at them to get in the house..i got kids to feed..they file in past Tabby whos still knoshing on the front steps..

Baby and Sasha both step on the three kittens who havent learned yet that when the dogs thunder back into the house, they dont look where they are going..the two older cats, Clyde the siamese and Scooter the siamese mix both know better and they are sitting in the "cat"chair..its a huge old lounger that has seen better days and now serves the purpose of providing a large scratching post and jungle gym for the house cats..people that come over know not to sit in it..or your friggin ass will be covered in cat hair..i mean covered..i am not the worlds best housekeeper so it gets cleaned maybe who cares..

I watch were I walk and lead the herd into the all 8 start either dancing around(the dogs)or meowing/squeeking ..scooter always tries to help me open the cans by hanging off the sink ledge by his claws and looking at me with his huge round blue blue..beautiful eyes..clyde is sitting in the background, he knows i will feed the kittens first and then him and scooter..the dogs get a biscuit to hold them over for five fucking minutes..they go out to the living room to eat their treats.. the kittens shadow my every move so if i manage to make it to the trash can and back without stepping on one its a miracle..i put out some canned food for the kittens and they attack it like they havent eaten in days..finally they are off my ass.
Then i open a can of tuna..not cat tuna..people tuna..the two grown cats, clyde and scooter will not lower themselves to eat cat food, its beneath them apparently..bastards will not shut the hell up until they get a spoonful of tuna in the morning...they also have to be fed in my bedroom since the kittens are wise to the tuna and will blow off the canned cat food for the finer cuts of people tuna..
As I take the tuna into the bedroom, I stop by the laundry room,were all the dry food is kept..I grab the dry catfood scoop, fill it and fill the bowls in my bedroom for the finicky adult felines, then i juggle the dog food scoop to take it back up t0 the living room where the dogs eat..nicky the fat cranky poodle eats expensive diet food, bitch has been eating it for three years and hasn't lost a fucking ounce. The other two dogs eat Ol Roy, a wally world brand. I bitch to myself about feeding so many worthless animals and perform a balancing act with the various scoops of pet food placing the correct food in the correct bowls..only ones left to feed are the parents of the three kittens..Bubba and Jackie the one eyed orange tabby mommie..they reside in the backyard along with Simone a beautiful blue point siamese that was born feral and inspite of my efforts to get close to her, she remains untrusting and aloof..gee, it couldnt be because the guys over in the cabinet shop filled her left hindquarter with bb's one afternoon...she still has a limp from that lovely altercation..Bubba was someones pet that was tossed aside, probably because the assholes didnt get him nuetered and he started spraying all over the place..Bubba talks to me the whole time I am outside..he loves when i take the time to sit and stroke his matted fur or pull stickers out of him..he's a sweet boy and huge but skinny as a rail..he keeps the other males out of the yards..he is the self appointed security guard for the two females, Simone and Jackie..there is a hiearchy among them all..and since Simon was killed last fall, Bubba is the top cat. He gets to eat before any one else, then the rest take their turns at the remaining canned food..if they dont get full then they visit the dry food bowl..

I finally get to sit down at my computer, the b&c still snoring loud enough to wake the dead..I finish this stupid post, and check my emails.I figure I will go to work early but very seldom do I get out of the house before 9am..ask me if i care...i watch the ferals clean themselves and then play and lounge in the morning sun which is now hitting the backyard and also the "cathouse" my son built for them when he got tired of my incessant whining...everyone is fed and happy, the kittens start playing with each other and Sasha the crackhead attempts to play with them too..the kittens check all the foodbowls to see if anyone left them any morsels..they didnt of course..we do this whole dance again at 6 pm..gee, i cant wait..

Bush and Bolton what a pair

(Pic courtesy of john and cross bone productions)
The idiot in the whitehouse is really pushing his luck..he wants the jackass Bolton to head our group at the UN..the guy(bolton) is a genuine, class a,overbearing original freak and all around fucking paranoid power hungry sumbitch.. other than that he really knows how to win friends and influence people...bolton i mean..bush is just the village idiot.. to get the latest horseshit on this fiasco please click on the link in the title.Posted by Hello

Sasha and innocent..of course they are..their sleeping for christ's sake..Sasha was a crackbaby..we are convinced of that fact and Bobbie's idea of fun is grabbing your ankle as you walk by and biting the shit out of it. Posted by Hello

How sweet, we made the National page in the NY Times

Not that its a nice article..personally I think the jackass's spent way too much money on manpower and shit..i mean it sounds like overkill and a waste of massive amounts of money to me when you need 1,300 federal and local police officers and nine helicopters. The raids, which were based on 43 search warrants, began at 3:30 a.m...I think even the gangbangers are sleeping usually at 3am...dont you? I love this soundbite:"We have effectively crippled the gang and put it out of business," said Debra Wong Yang, the United States attorney for the Central District of California. Is this bitch delusional?They only got 23 guys for gods sake.. The feds are using the RICO act to go after these guys..I hope they put the lil fucknuts away for a long time..that way they can corrupt the inside of the prisons instead of the outside..where us good folks live...For a look into the gang life in LA and how they dont give a rats ass about going to prison I would like to suggest a movie entitled "American Me" with Edward James Olmos. Its graphic and violent but its a very realistic look at gangs in southern cali..i have spent time in that enviornment and it was scary and interesting as hell all at the same time..i just kept my mouth shut and smiled alot. The link to the article is embedded in the title.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005 | By: Unknown

Summer Solstice..lets celebrate!

To go the site that has this wealth of info click the title of the post :)

In the northern hemisphere, the longest day of the year (near June 22) when the Sun is farthest north. In the southern hemisphere, winter and summer solstices are exchanged. The summer solstice marks the first day of the season of summer. The declination of the Sun on the (northern) summer solstice is known as the tropic of cancer (23° 27').
The summer solstice is the longest day of the year, respectively, in the sense that the length of time elapsed between sunrise and sunset on this day is a maximum for the year. Of course, daylight saving time means that the first Sunday in April has 23 hours and the last Sunday in October has 25 hours, but these human meddlings with the calendar and do not correspond to the actual number of daylight hours. In Chicago, there are 15:02 hours of daylight on the summer solstice of June 21, 1999.
Here is a QuickTime movie illustrating the tilt of the Earth's equatorial plane relative to the Sun which is responsible for the seasons. The dates of maximum tilt of the Earth's equator correspond to the summer solstice and winter solstice, and the dates of zero tilt to the vernal equinox and autumnal equinox.
Monday, June 20, 2005 | By: Unknown

Click here,You have got to read Ms. Fabulous' most recent post..

I swear to god i almost died laughing..thats because i choked on my fucking water whilst reading it..its entitled:Ian the Pornographic Yoda with Oranges, Bananas and Prunes

funniest stuff i read all day..and thats all i have done all day blogs..fuck the world, i took the day off..

Now for something funny...

I got the annual letter from the State of Cali tax it is all my rights as a taxpayer..oh..and a bill for 11 grand..actually $11,356.43

these are for taxes they say I owe from 1991,92,93,94 and last but not least 2001. the majority of the bill is penalties...the actual amount owed is roughly 4 grand..this is from when i waitressed at the previously mentioned sportsbar by the sea..except the 2001 debt..that is the last time I worked a real job 40 hours a week. If I had filed my taxes I would of received a refund..but i didnt for whatever reasons...yet they are kind enough to send me a bill every so often that includes my rights as a taxpayer..sweet people those taxmen and women..hope they arent holding their collective breath waiting for the money..someones gonna turn blue and die..

The MEN in my life..I use that term loosely mind you...

This post is in purple because its my favorite deep meanings there..i just wanted to share..

I have been married four times..that includes the current spouse usually referred to as the Ball&Chain or b&c for short. I was married to one flake son's biological father..we call him the biological father cuz the muthafucka was never ever a father figure or a father sperm does not make you a father and the method doesnt matter. He was always the love of my life until he tossed me out for the last time saying and I quote:"I don't want a babysitter anymore, I want to do whatever the fuck I want. If that means drink myself to death so be it, but you need to go back to San Diego, call your sister NOW". I remember the quote like he said it to me yesterday, when in fact he said it to me over four years ago. I am so fucking glad he said it to me cuz i do not think I would of left on my own. I tried for years and years to help him overcome his alcoholism and failed..but I didnt fail..he did..i have to keep telling myself that. He was the nicest guy on the face of the earth when he was sober..the meanest drunk you ever met when he was..well, drunk. His name was Bruce..there is a theme here in that name..I use the past tense "WAS" since i have no clue if he is still alive. He contacted me about two years ago, my stupid sista gave him my home number just to get him to quit calling her house and leaving sorrowful messages for moi. I told him I was remarried and to leave me alone for all eternity..he had his shot..twice even..oh, and I thanked him for kicking me out that final time..the drunk was husband's number two and three. I wish I could of saved him from himself but I couldnt..took me a long fucking time to figure that one out.

The first husband was a nice guy named Bruce as well. He married me when I was 19 and he was 32. I loved him with all my heart and soul. We were together for 7 years. He loved to smoke Pot. He smoked about 10 joints a day..i shit you not..he would sit in his lounger each night and roll 10 doobies for the next day. The man was sweet and non-violent. And those doobies were big sumbitches..not small petite we got older I found I did not like to sit at home and zone out to TV each and every fucking night so I moved back to San Diego and moved in with my mom and dad..that was a thrill folks..I lasted two weeks at their house and moved in with a bunch of friends totalling five that lived in a one bedroom apartment. We would fight over floor space nightly so I got a place with one of them within the month. Bruce#1 and I stayed very close inspite of the differences, he would come to San Diego two weekends a month and "service my account". I loved him for that, it made the transistion easier i think. He stopped coming to town when I met Bruce#2. Bruce #1 was a great friend and confidant but the age difference caught up w/us. Its hard to live with someone who has already enjoyed being young when YOUR in that phase and the highlight of the evening is picking which sitcom to watch. I never stopped loving him but I wanted to experience life. I made the poor man move from San Diego to Boston and then to Arizona, all in a 7 year time frame..he was patient and good to me, never ever thumping on me or going off on me. I think of him on occasion and it makes me smile. He never cut his hair after he got out of the Air Force. Boy that shit was long! He was Portuguese and had the most beautiful smile and bright shiny eyes..his eyes were prolly shiny only cuz the sumbitch smoked so much pot, but I still loved looking into them.

I took a hiatus from relationships after Bruce#2 the first go around. I concentrated on getting a decent job ,making money and raising my son alone..its all i did for the most part, i had very few friends. I left him in Virginia and drove back to San Diego with my son who was 8 at the time. We didnt make it out of the state before my car blew up..literally. We moved in with my EX in-laws for a month till I could afford to purchase another piece of shit car to make the long trek back to the land of Cali. That buick made it to San Diego and promptly died. as it should be i did what I wanted which was get me the hell back to the left coast and hopefully some normalcy. Wrong was I..there is no normalcy in the world anymore..i am convinced of that..anyway..I refused to get involved with any man because my son was so desperate for a father figure he would latch on to any guy I was seeing even casually. I raised the little house ape alone and did a pretty good job of it until...

My son's name is Brian, he is 25,tall and handsome like his father. He also has a problem with alcohol like his sperm-donor father. He is also a mean drunk. We shall speak more of that son was a fine child, getting A's in school and never making life difficult until he reached the age of 12..then all hell broke loose. The kid might look like his father but he has my temperment, poor kid. I was working 10 or more hours a day and he was a latch key kid. He is very intelligent, always tested in the 90 percentile range. He would never apply himself after he reached 12. He thought me and the world owed him something and he was gonna collect. I had to spend the next two years of our lives bailing him out of jail, out of problems at school and report him as a runaway ever other week. The topper was when I found a room-full of "white out" that he had been huffing. This all came about when he passed out in class and peed all over himself after huffing a can of computer cleaner in the back of a geography class. I turned into a warden at this point in my life, determined to get his head out of his ass and make him a decent member of society. I moved us to a top flight neighborhood, bought a condo down the street from my mom and went so far into debt trying to right his ship that I almost committed suicide twice. The kid just would not reform, in fact he got worse. He tried to burn my condo down once and took an exacto knife to all my worldly belongings..he never went to school, he made up stories for the shrink I was paying out the ass to take him to every week and generally became a loser extraordinare. I sent him to a ranch for Fuck-ups in northern LA county. That cost me $300 a month and he didnt last a year. He got tossed out for having a gun. They kinda frown on that shit. I still dont know where he got the gun and i dont really care anymore. At this point a sane person might get some professional help, but I couldnt afford it..I was tapped out. The condo was costing me an arm and leg, the lawyer bills for his previous bullshit were breaking the bank and on top of that someone stole my checks and wrote about 3K in hot checks before I knew what hit me.The bank refuesed to give me back my money so I did what any normal person would..I snapped..I sold my condo for nothing, I told the bank, the laywers and the creditors to all kiss my ass and I moved myself the the devil child to Georgia. A friend lived there and said the schools didnt take kindly to kids like him and would fix his ass good.Plus, the state of GA. expects children to behave like children and they actually put them in juvenile hall if they are chronic fuckups like brian.Cali never once made him accountable for his actions, just putting it off on me, the single parent without a support group of friends and family. So we moved to GA. That lasted less than three months. I found a killer job I loved, running a construction business. I had a feeling things were going to change for the better....WRONG...the kid took my bank card and cleaned me the tune of $2k..he then took my car during a driving rain storm and promptly totaled it less than four blocks away. He took off and was gone...the cops said there was nothing they could do if they couldnt find him..I had no car to go to work, I had no money to pay my rent and I was sick of worry about that fucking kid..I waited a week in the apartment for him to come back. I lost my job cuz i couldnt get to my job. I sat in my apartment and contemplated suicide..i even got in the tub with a razor blade and tried like hell to slit my wrists..i just couldnt do it, which really pissed me off folks..

I broke down and called my sista..the one that always takes me in when I am running from something or someone. She paid for my plane ticket home and put me up for quite awhile. I removed my head from my ass and got on with life. I went back to my old job and made lots of money. I did not know if my son was dead or alive for six months until one day I got a call at work. It was a police officer from Georgia saying they had my son in custody. He was arrested for breaking into a house and stealing a gun collection. The cop wanted to know when I was gonna come out there and get my kid since he was under age and all would be forgiven if I just took him back w/me to Cali..LMAO..i know my rights as a parent and if your child is picked up commiting a crime you can tell them to fuck i did...they tried to scare me into coming out there and it didnt work. I talked to a shrink and a lawyer and both said I did what I could and now it was time for this kid to pay the piper. He did time in juvenile hall and then was put into the system as a ward of the court. He went from home to home, always refusing to talk to me..afterall..i fucked HIM over by not bailing him out of that nasty little mess with the broke my heart that he could not see the error of his ways and talk to me. I wanted him back but i knew he had to deal with this shit alone..I am an enabler and I would of been no help to him.He didnt speak to me for two years. I became a drunk and quit my high paying job and became a waitress in a sportsbar at the beach..I didnt have to think, i didnt have to do shit unless I wanted to..I started to enjoy my life and the freedom that I had never expierienced before since I was always someones mom, sister, wife,maid or general doormat. I loved my life even if I did drink too much. I was not hurting anyone but myself and it really didnt hurt a bit...well it did screw the hell out of my liver..oh well a small price to pay for was good...until...

Bruce#2 hunted me down again...and since I was a drunk i figured what the hell, lets be drunk together, maybe we can make it work this time. I let him back into my life..wrong move bozo.....but I must say it did make me straighten out MY life and become a functioning member of society again.. I felt the urge to move so we went to Arizona..I got a nice apartment, I told the ol man he could just be a househusband and try to stay sober..he couldnt of course..then the kid deceided it was time to try and make it work as a family..he was actually very happy that me and Bruce#2 had gotten back together..maybe daddy will be a daddy this time around..nope;..didnt happen..the kid ended up knocking the living shit out of daddy one night when he went after me for pouring his booze down the drain. Shortly thereafter I went back to San Diego and the sister that always takes me in..god bless her..i love that bitch w/every fiber of my being..too bad we can only get along for 48 hours at a time..both of us are type-A type assholes..

So, the kid followed me to San Diego and took his fathers place as the mean drunk in my life,not working and being a general blight on me and society..I was losing my sanity again when the B&C came into my life..I took him up on his offer to move to Bakersfrigginfield and let him support me and coddle me and do whatever the fuck i wanted for the rest of my life..the b&c didnt promise to give me sex and I should of been aware of that fact prior to moving in but I wasn't. The b&c is a good man but we have very little in common. He loves country music,, and i hate that shit. His idea of a good time is watching 40 year old cowboy movies..the b&c is a diabetic with highblood pressure, hes 10 years older than I and he cant walk to the fucking fridge without getting winded. He lets me do anything my little heart desires, even if its bad for me. He never tells me no cuz then i would lose it and he hates when i start yelling..everyone including the animals hate when I start yelling..every living thing leaves the room when I start yelling. its not a pretty site..Anyways.the kid from hell moved back to AZ after I bailed on him in San DIego. he promptly found out that life on your own sucks donkey balls cuz you cant party all the time AND keep a roof over your head and food in the house..he slit his wrists and ended up in the psych ward two days before Thanksgiving two years ago. I spent thanksgiving day driving to AZ and dragging his worthless ass back to bakerfrigginfield. I laid down the law prior to taking him out of the nut ward. I told him he will work a job and pay rent, he will move out after six months and get a place of his own..well two out of three aint bad..he still lives with us the little prick. He got a job he likes for the first time in his young life and he has worked for two years straight..hes a plumber in new housing construction. All those office jobs I got him never worked out..guess hes an outdoors manual labor type..

I met Bruce#3 a baseball chat room. I love baseball..b as we shall call, him is a sweet soul that has a big fucking chip on his shoulder because of the cards he was delt in life..oh..hes also a manic Cardinals fan..nice play on words eh? I want to leave the b&c and try life with b..but its not working out that way for some reason..mainly because I can not bring myself to leave the b&c. The man saved me from myself and/or certain death. He is a sweet-natured man that loves me more than anyone ever has..he doesnt ask for much in return,just dinner on the table each night and watching tv with him..usually sports cuz i wont watch 40 year old fucking cowboy movies..he fixes my screwups and loves my son like he is his own. My son gave him TWO fathers day was hysterically funny the other was sweet and sincere. My son told him in the sweet card that the b&c taught him how to be a man, and I believe this to be true since the kid has finally amounted to something and quit drinking..over eight months now..he smokes a helluva lot of pot but who cares..he goes to work each day and pays his bills..when he finally get s out on his own I am sure the pot smoking will tone will have can not buy lots of pot and pay your rent and bills..but back to the Bruce#3...he will hopefully figure out what he wants or needs , drop that huge chip on his shoulder and enjoy his life with or without me. He needs to realize that HE is the only person that can make himself happy, i can not do it for him. Life is unfair but there isnt a damn thing you can do about it so suck it up and deal with it. He has the ability to do whatever he wants within the limits of his health issues and yet he does nothing. He can go anywhere, see the world or get off the internet and find a life among the living. His negativity suffocates me alot of the time but i still love him and care about him. I hope and pray that he gets his head out of his ass and makes a life for himself. If he can do that, then maybe there is hope for us..until then I refuse to leave my good,sweet, wonderful but sexless husband and join him. I will stay in a marriage that does not satisfy all my needs but nutures me and my son. I get to go to San Diego for a week alone every month so I do get a break, so how can i bitch? I do not have to work unless I want to and I do whatever the hell I please..i just do not have anyone to share it with..but these are the men in my life..I love them all for better or worse..
Sunday, June 19, 2005 | By: Unknown

Baseball news

This was another one of those "Interleague" play some of you are aware, I find interleague play unnatural, like kissing your sister or feeling up your mom..its just not done in civilized societies. This week the American League came out on top of most of the battles with the exception of the St. Louis Cards..those fuckers swept the Tampa Bay Devilrays..who as most baseball fans know suck pond scum. The Orioles are still in first by a mere 3 games over the Red Sox and the hated Yank$ are still in third in the AL East..yes, the yank$ ARE moving up in the rankings, but this writer considers that an anomaly and they should hit the skids again real soon. The Chicago White Sox have a comfortable 7 game lead on their closest rivals the Minnasota Twins in the AL Comedy Central. The twinkies just lost two straight to my boyz the San Diego Padres this weekend..
The Los Angeles/California/ Anaheim Angels are still holding down first in the AL west. Those monkey loving fools have been there all season and that is a good thing for a Cali native such as myself, although Daisy's boyz the Texas ButtRangers who are only two games out of first are coming on strong as of late. I love the ButtRangers manager, Buck Showalter so I do not have any problems with them overtaking the Angels if God sees fit to let that happen..she is a Ranger fan I heard somewhere recently..good for her, the Rangers need all the fans they got considering that no one in their right frame of mind goes to sit in the Texas heat and humidity this time of year to watch a baseball game. Why didnt those dipshits build an enclosed stadium like the Houston Astros? Fuck if I know..The Oakland A's are tanking like a fat guy in a marathon..its sad to see a once great team play so just makes ya wanna cry if your an A's fan..which I am not so screw the bitches with a lead pipe.

On the senior circuit, otherwise known as the National League, The East is being led by those transplants from Canuck Land, the Expos, now known as the Nationals..aka the GNATS..i like to use the proper spelling of the word i find it cute..the Gnats have a slim 2 game lead over the Phillies. Now the Phils have one of THE most butt ugly mascots in sports, the Philly Phanatic..its a lime green concoction that closely resembles a deranged Care Bear that has been up on Meth for a month straight..the third place team is the Atlanta Braves who are absolutely sucking so bad this year that Bobby Cox, the geriatric manager might finally step down. We can only hope sportsfans...when your manager looks like an alzheimers victim lost in his own neighborhood half the time, its hard to have any confidence in the team and its players..

The NL Central is being led by none other than those friggin Cards..they have a comfortable 9 and a half game margin over those losers at wrigley, the Cubbies whom I hate only because they beat the shit out of my Padres then got swept by the fucking Yank$. How could the Cubs let the Yank$ sweep em? Have they no pride? Nah,its not that..they are just missing some bats and most of their pitching is on the DL..which come to think of it are the main ingredients for a winning baseball team. The rest of that division has lost more than half their games and playing .500 ball would be a godsend for those losers..there are six teams in that division and FOUR are below .500 in wins..makes me think the Cards get cocky by the end of the season and then lose in the playoffs when they actually play a decent team..afterall, with the new way its set up in baseball you play the teams in your own division more than anyone a false sense of security is a possibility for some teams at the top of their standings in very shitty divisions such as the AL and NL Comedy Central.

Ok, we are now at the NL hope and prayers rest squarely on the shoulders of the San Diego Padres and the AZ. Diamondbacks..both of whom are on the wrong end of a streak..the losing streak..both teams are 4-6 in their last 10 games...way to go boyz..your sucking dick like a wimp in jail with a bunch of hard core biker dudes..thank god the Dodgers are just as bad with a 3-7 record in the last 10. The Pad's are still leading the group of NL West losers by a whopping 3 and a half and 4 games respectively..the Padres play the Dodgers for a four game series this week, so we might have a change in the top spot. I hope way in hell i want to listen to the b&c cackel like a friggin moron if the hated Dodgers take over would make me very very upset and I would have to find ways to retaliate if the boyz from Hell-A take over first in the NL West. Like refusing to make dinner, or making him sleep on the couch, or cook the foods i know he hates w/a passion. I have my ways ..muahahahahah..such an evil laugh..

The big story this week was the Angels pitcher Brendan Donnelly getting busted with a "foreign substance" on his glove during his last outing..this is tantamount to having cork in a bat for a hitter...its massive cheating and i hope the prick loses every game he plays in after he serves his ten game suspension. I hate cheating..unless it involves the IRS..then go for the gusto I always any case,there is your baseball news for this week sportsfans..have a wonderful week and come back around next sunday for more insights into the fantastic world of Major League Baseball..
Saturday, June 18, 2005 | By: Unknown

100 things about moi you never knew and wish I wouldnt tell you..

Ok..i can not get this out of my head but i saw it on the Queen of Pink's goes..
1. I spent my youth railing against the government and the fed's have a nice dossier on me which I found out when I had to get a secret clearance.
2. I am the oldest of 5 siblings, only one is a male.
3.We moved every 3-5 years when I was a child, being a navy brat has its shortcomings.
4.I have been married 4 times, twice to the same imbecile.
5.I raised my son alone and I was glad about that fact.
6. Never tell me I can not do something cuz then I will for spite.
7.I was the project manager for several key government spy satellites.
8.I raised my brother and sisters because my mother was an alcoholic and my dad was out to sea for a year at a time.
9. I skipped a grade in elementary school.
10. I graduated high school at 16 and a half.
11. I have an degree in psychology and never used the fucker...EVER
12.I have lived on both coasts and find the east coasters are less tolerant than left coasters.
13.I love to sing when I drive.
14. I can't carry a tune to save my ass.
15. I dont care that I sound like a cow pissing on a flat rock when i sing.
16. I used to drop acid once a week for over a year period during my youth.
17. I am an excellent chess player.
18. I drove a stockcar for an entire season and never finished a race.
19. I didnt finish a race because the guys would put me into the wall at some point EVERY fucking race.
20. I have never lost a freeway race however.
21. I never pay my speeding tickets.
22. I drove for over 10 years without a legal drivers license.
23. I was arrested for taking part in the burning of the Bank of America in Isla Vista during the early 70's.
24. I harbored fugitives for the Weathermen during the same period of time.
25. I sometimes wish I was a natural blonde and thin..but i take a nap and the feeling goes away.
26. I had to learn to make dinner to feed my siblings when I was 7 years old.
27. I beat the shit out of my dad with a brass lamp when I was 15 cuz he started thumping on my mom.
28. I ran away over 20 times as a minor.
29. I got tired of being dragged back home so I became an emancipated minor at 17.
30. I have supported myself since I was 17.
31. Needless to say, I never really had a childhood, but I got over it...I think..
32. I gave my grandma marijuana when she was dying of cancer. She begged me for it.
33. I have driven cross country alone three times.
34. I can change a water pump, alternator and various other things on a car.
35. I never wanted a child, but I love my son more than anyone else in this world.
36. I wish said son would finally get out on his own and find out its tough to make it alone in this world.
37. I engineered taking my middle sisters kids away from her when we realized she was a meth addict.
38. I knocked my mother out on mothers day once. The woman just would NOT get off my ass, not to mention she was drunk as a skunk.
39. I taught my sisters to read and write before they went to kindergarden.
40. I have pointed a gun at someone AND pulled the trigger.Yes, it was loaded.
41. I have no problem sticking up for someone that is being hasseled unfairly.
42. I hate President Bush with every fiber of my being.
43. I worry about Global Warming and its consequences to the point that it makes me cry sometimes.
44. I love to watch the sunrise or the sunset over water.
45. I have seen the "green flash" once in my life while watching a sunset over the Pacific Ocean.
46. I want to live in Buda or Pest..doesnt matter which.
47. I want to visit Paris while I am still young enough to enjoy it.
48. I can ride a horse bareback and not fall off.
49. I cry when animals are abused.
50. I rescue alot of abused animals.
51. I have threatened to beat the shit out of grown men for abusing animals...TO THEIR FACE.
52. I quit a 60K a year job to waitress in a sportsbar.
53. I loved that job more than any job I have ever had.
54. I loved living in Boston more than any place I have ever lived.
55. I almost froze to death as a 5 year old when I dug a tunnel in the snow and fell asleep.
56. I went to over 10 schools as a child. We moved alot in the navy.
57. I used to run away to Haight-Ashbury alot in my teens.
58. I used to hitchhike to work every day when I was 17.
59. I ate a bottle of aspirin as a toddler. Jesus, what the fuck was i thinking?
60. I knocked my brother out with a sledgehammer when I was 11. I thought I had killed him.Thank god he had that cheap ass army helmet on.
61. I developed gangrene in my right shin as a child. I still have a round scar the size of a nickel.
62. I got 30 stitches in my right knee when I split the fucker open on a curb showing off how I could ride my bike without using my hands.
63. I rode a motorcycle to San Francisco on a dare once. I was living in Santa Barbara at the time. It was a Norton and boy did it suck.
64. I do not swallow, I spit.
65.I believe that for the MOST part, men are not emotionally equal to woman. We by far are the better sex.
66. George Bush is fucking moron and his time in hell will be long and painful.
67. I used to blast "Sympathy for the Devil" every Sunday morning when I lived behind a church and the parishoners were filing in for services.
68. I believe in God and I talk to him/her often. I do not however mince words and chew God's ass out on occasion.
69.I love music especially the blues.
70.I love professional sports and will watch Sportscenter over and over again like a retard.
71. I am NOT a morning person.
72. I usually live on roughly 4 hours sleep a nite..and not 4 hours together..basically I nap.
73. I like that I am a mouthy bitch.
74. I am lucky to have been a teenager of the 70's.Those WERE the days.
75. I am loyal to people that I care about, but if they fuck me over I will eat them alive.
76. I spend way too much time reading blogs but I cant help myself.
77. I get depressed and spend days in bed when my teams fall out of contention for the playoffs.
78. I stay married to a man that I love but for the wrong reasons.
79. I try to save the world and change the world. I know thats fruitless but I have to try.
80. I enjoy the company of people that I have never met. Online friendships are built on different levels and usually looks dont have a fucking thing to do with them,which is the way it should be in life.
81. I bitch, therefore I am.
82. I think life is a bowl of cherries but someone stuck a rotten one in my bowl..if I find that fucker I will beat his ass.
83. I had a friend die in my arms.
84. I love Skyy vodka but I dont drink it anymore.
85. I shower my animals with love and affection but I yell at them for stupid things like following me from room to room like a fucking caravan.
86. I love coming home to a doorway full of animals waiting to greet me.
87. I love that Sasha talks to me when I come home from a long trip.Sasha is a dog folks and she grumbles, or growls.
88. I hate that life is unfair.
89. I respect my husband for putting up with me. The man should be sainted.
90. I want our troops out of IRAQ now.
91. I wish I could mellow out a little.
92. I have two blown discs in my lower back and I refuse to let them be fixed which means I am risking paralysis if I sneeze wrong while tying my shoes.
93. I was told this over 20 years ago about my back..I like to play the odds evidently.
94. I scream at slow elderly drivers in the fast lane.
95. I am always amazed at the ignorance of some people.
96. I feel that God is in everyone of us..its just that some people are drowning out his/hers advice to the detrement of the rest of the population.
97. I think Sadaam Hussien should be corn-holed by everyone whos ever been fucked over by him.
98. I think the same thing about George Bush.
99. I think I am tired of writing this shit.
100. I think NO ONE in their right mind is gonna read this whole fucking list of worthless blather.
Friday, June 17, 2005 | By: Unknown

Come on people..they are ALL housebroken now..i swear..

Here they are..the three stooges..they are probably females however..but their names currently are(from left to right) bobbie,fred and leroy. Their eyes are being treated with an antibiotic ointment from the vet since ferals almost always have some kind of upper resperatory thing of one sort or another. It was a pain in the ass to get this picture..they never sit still for more than a second. Bobbie is now a confirmed catbox user, no wayward cat shit anywhere in the house in 48 hours...PRAISE JESUS!!! (five bucks says we keep them all dammit)Posted by Hello
Thursday, June 16, 2005 | By: Unknown

Holy Mary, mother of God..what a day

it was one of those know the just didn't pay to get out of bed..its hysterical on the back end..but jeez..give me a break..the b&c playing dumb as rock first thing in the AM did not bode well for the rest of my day..

My part time job has turned into a full time job as of of the reps in my district said adios and the remaining two(that includes me, duh)had to split her workload..i didnt mind for the first couple weeks but its cutting into my play time now..dammit..

Anyways..I collect data for most of the major food and beverage manufacturers. Its way beneath me since most of my life I have been in a position of authority, but it was only supposed to be a part time job and it paid well, not to mention it was very loose about the working hours and days..hey, a girl has to be able to pay those credit card bills for all those shoes...thats what drew me to it..fucking I will be go to hell if i dont hate it right about now..

I have a laptop that belongs to my employer worth around 2K that I haul along to record the data from various retailers..usually the big grocery I was taking a short smoke break outside of one of the larger grocery stores in the bakersfrigginfield metro area..its in a great neighborhood..

This guy is walking towards me, he seems to be bumbling a little, like maybe he had a liquid lunch..I am sitting my tired ol geezer ass on a step stool i haul around in the shopping cart. Yes, I said a shopping cart. Its easier to put my laptop, purse and step stool in a shopping cart when I walk the store aisles than to haul the shit by hand..screw that for god's sake..anyways..i see him out of the corner of my eye and i hear him as he says:"Look at that homeless broad, she looks like she doesnt miss too many meals.." Bear in mind this fucker has a beer belly that screams "what color are your socks jackass, bet you cant see YOUR feet without bending over". He is dressed in a white button down shirt and nice slacks with a very cheap ugly ass tie.

Hes talking to another male walking with him..the other male giggles..giggling is so gay in a male..but thats not my point..

My point is this..he is about 20 feet away from me and hes loud enough for my hard-rock ruined ears to hear. I CAN NOT let this pass..nope..its not gonna happen folks..I gotta respond.

So as this nimrod gets closer, I say and do the following: I hold up my well manicured hand and say "How many homeless broads you know with a $30 set of airbrushed nails and a 2 thousand dollar laptop pal?"

About now he is even with me. I am still sitting on my fucking stool smoking my marlboro. He looks down his nose at me and says" Am I talking to you bitch?" I stood up and said..what did you call me you fucknut? you might not be talking TO me but your damn sure are talking ABOUT me. At this point in time let me preface the rest of the story by mentioning that I knocked over a friggin display of fucking canned chili by moving one fucking can mind you..and it made ALOT of fucking noise in that mostly empty store..i swear it was like some jackass set it up to fall like a house of can in succession after another..thank god it wasnt the expensive liquor display eh? hey no shit...anyway..i wasnt in the best of moods and this asshole runs his yap...

so...he actually stops right in front of me. I am standing there toe to toe with some jerk that smells like bourbon. his little friend walks a few steps ahead and then realizes that Mr. Wonderful has stopped in front of me. he doesnt walk back, he just stands there.

Mr. Wonderful has a great comeback..he says.."fuck you".. I laugh and say.."thats it? thats your fucking comeback you dipshit? Did you learn that one in college you brain dead idiot? Go have another drink and kill some more brain cells you stupid fuck.Its 2 in the afternoon and your lit up like a roman candle. Going back to work pal?" I love calling guys pisses them off so bad..

At this point I realized I might have taken this a little far. but then again..he asked for it.

So as I stand there glaring at this jerkwad and waiting for his next pearl of wisdom i think....hope that ugly fuck isnt going into the store..i would hate to make a scene INSIDE the might reflect badly on the company i work for and worse..i could get my ass chewed big time..

So anticipating a small but vocal exchange i wait to see what hes gonna say..cuz I am the queen of comebacks sportsfans..I have had years of practice..

and he says..fuck you bitch...I shit you not.

So i have to put him in his i say..."repeating yourself now? JESUS CHRIST..get out of my face your pathetic." His little friend now giggles at my remark. I just hope he doesnt haul off and hit me or something..i got a bad back for gods sake..

He smiles and says..."sorry, my bad your not homeless your just a bitch" to which I reply.."you finally got something right moron...congratulations. "His friend howls now.

Mr. Wonderful now turns on his heel and at a quick trot, heads down the sidewalk without looking back..I had to give him a parting remark so i yell..have a nice day sweetie....

it still didnt make up for the canned goods fiasco..that was embarrassing.

Welcome to Anal-Retentive 101 i ask the ball and chain: What are we going to do about all the kittens??

b&c: I dont know..keep one and give the other two away?
moi: OK, I want to keep leroy(the grey tabby,he is my fav)
b&c:We cant give Bobbie away.He shits whereever he wants and someone would be mean to him or toss him away.
moi:Ok, so WE get stuck w/the non-boxed trained kitty to protect his lil ass? somehow I am not liking this idea..cuz its MY ASS that will be cleaning up cat shit and pee for all eternity.
b&c:Well, lets just give him a little more time, I saw him go voluntarily into the cat box today.
moi: so what your saying is you want to keep Bobbie?
b&c: I dont know. Bobbie is the most playful and cutiest.
moi: Bobbie shits in any place but his catbox. I can not tolerate an animal that doesnt know where to deposit his poop or urine. The cat is a tard dear, yes hes cute as a bug and very sweet but hes fucking retarded as hell when it comes to using the catbox.
b&c: Well, we could keep two of them.I want Bobbie and you want Leroy.
moi: We dont need two more animals in this house..we got three fucking dogs and two squirrely cats as it is..
b&c:I just worry that they wont get good homes.
moi: SO..what your saying really is that you want to keep ALL the fucking kittens.
b&c:Um...i dont know..i think we keep all or none, I dont want to have to choose.No one will love them like we do..or spoil them like we do..
moi:Thats right jackass, no one will cater to the lil turds like we do..the fucking animals run our house, we get babysitters for the damn things every time we go out of town and frankly I am tired of spending half my day feeding or cleaning up after them all.
b&c: Ok, then lets get rid of all of them but Nicky.
moi:Right....what i am trying to say want all these animals but you dont help take care of need to start helping out w/the care and feeding of the lil fuckers..
b&c:I do...when your out of town, which lately is every other week.
moi: this discussion is now about my time out of town?
b&c: Well, you wanted to rescue all these animals and then you spend half your life out of town leaving me and brian to take care of them.
moi: Jerry, I am trying to thin out the herd jackass..My original question was what to do w/the kittens now BEFORE we get attached to them.
b&c: Well, aren't you attached to them all?
moi: Not quite yet. I will be shortly if we dont do something with the extra kittens.The "cat people" will find them good homes and I will give them a hefty donation to boot.
b&c: How hefty?
moi:OMFG..jerry, its my money and I will do with it as i see fit. I feel the need to give some "guilt" money to the Cat People when I turn over the kittens.
b&c:which ones are we gonna get rid of?

Nevermind..I fixed it..

thanks john :)
Wednesday, June 15, 2005 | By: Unknown

Does Anyone know why the fuck my right column is at the bottom??

I have no clue why or what i did to make it happen..but i FUCKING HATE IT..anyone know how to fix the fucker?? I want all those adorable blogs to be at the TOP of the page, not the friggin bottom..

look at this lil guy...he screams LOVE ME!!!! Posted by Hello

anyone want a kitten..come know you do.. Posted by Hello

Autopsy supports Terry Schiavo's husband..

The husband for Terry Schiavo was right all along, her brain was toast the doctor said:“The brain weighed 615 grams, roughly half of the expected weight of a human brain," he added. ..which i do not find suprizing..i am glad for him he was proven correct. Her parents and their fucking bullshit drama can kiss his ass now..and beg for his forgiveness..all the shit they put that man through..the link to the story is embedded in the title..

Someone told me baseball is boring..bullshit i say!

PLAY BALL!!!! God I love’s the longest season of any professional sport! The best part about baseball is that it’s a team one player on a team can do it player can not get all the outs or hit all the homeruns.. People that don’t follow baseball think it’s a slow,boring sport..PLEASE!!! how can you call it slow..when so much happens on the field? The pitcher is throwing a ball at roughly 80-98 mph..the hitter is swinging..the baserunner is attempting to steal second..all at the same time! TV tries to do justice to baseball, but if it wasn’t for replays..we would miss half the action! The beauty of the double play..i love it..everyone is in the right place, and it goes off without a spite of the guy barreling to second base..trying his hardest to take out the second basemen with his cleats at face level..the thirdbasemen leaping at a ball that is flying by him at 80 mph and he catches it! Can you do that? I know I cant….you can be a great hitter, or a great defensive player..but its hard to find someone excellent at both..and a five tool player is rare these days..almost can buy a world series sometimes..but if the florida marlins have anything to say about it..YOU WONT..HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…a good game,where the pitchers are dueling it out..i cant think of a better way to spend an evening..everytime the crack of the bat breaks the silence..everyone is watching..hoping their team just got a break the logjam on the scoreboard…god, I love 1-1 ties going into the 13th inning..comes down to the bullpen..the BULLPEN..what kind of name is that for a bunch of guys sitting around waiting for a chance to make an impact in the game? I can see why its called that actually..all that that pitch occasionally hoping to god its their nite to rock someones world and strike out the side..the pen is where its at..all those warriors hoping for a chance to show their stuff..great pitching beats great hitting..or so they say....sometimes it just takes one bad pitch and the whole game is broken wide fucking open..the flood gates are opened, and’s a slugfest!..or the other side of the coin..the closer walks out to the mound..and strikes out all three, two,three..its home safely folks! The FOUL ball..the word itself is interesting..foul..something smelly, and disgusting..but guys can hit fouls off forever at the plate..only the first two count! It’s a battle then..when is the pitcher gonna toss the big fat one over the plate that either sits the guy down, or he pummels it over the fence for a homer! HOW IS THAT BORING? It keeps me on the edge of my seat for gods sake. And god forbid you commit an error..those babes can cost you a game..on both sides of the fence..take for instance the pitcher that BALKED in the winning run in the 14th way in hell I want to be him..the pain and agony he must of must have been billy buckner-esque…Carlton Fisk..i was walking behind Fenway Park when he hit THAT ball in the playoffs during the 70' was after 2am, and I had to work the next day..god was I pissed..i had to run all the way home to see what the hell happened..ever since that game..i NEVER leave a game till the last pitch is thrown..i guess I should end this tirade..but I love the game..more than anything else I can think of..the beauty of it all amazes me..its so damn good they should bottle the feeling of a hard fought win,where else do you find grown men jumping up and down like little boys all would beat everything they got in pill form! So..DO NOT TELL ME BASEBALL IS have no clue if you say don’t know what your missing. It’s the best of all worlds..its got drama, comedy, pain, has been a bonding experience for children and parents for over a hundred years! Every season..each team has a chance to excel and win the world series no matter how big or small their audience or payroll is..the marlins showed us that..twice even! The yanks with their HUGE payroll couldn’t get the clutch hit..the dodgers w/their payroll couldn’t even get in the playoffs for years! Its not about money all the time..its about heart..its about 20 guys all feeling they are the best team on the field that day inspite of some nimrod on the radio telling them they don’t have a snowballs chance in hell of winning it all..its about camraderie, and sucking it up and playing tomorrow even though you didn’t win today or yesterday or the day before that..and every day is another opportunity for a fantastic game that people will talk about for years..ya gotta love it..i do..
Tuesday, June 14, 2005 | By: Unknown

My favorite scenic webcams...

nothing deep here..but these are some nice webcams around the can watch the sunrise on budapest..or the grand canyon..or the hustle and bustle of a ny street.. (this one is on the LIVE MJPEG link for streaming video. Its overlooking the danube and the cities of Buda and Pest. the wonderful folks over at the dept of the interior have some great webcams of some national being the Grand Canyon, others include Joshua Tree and the Sequoia Nat. Park, which is about two hours from my house. this one is nice..has a few cams on the Seine and the Eiffel Tower.

and last but not least..a street in NYC... for john of course..

As one Juror said..he's guilty of something...

After pondering the jury's verdict for a 24 hour period..i can only think of this line from one of the jurors..the fact that they couldn't prove anything kinda leaves everyone hanging...legally he's off the hook..that strange little man with the fake nose and a propensity for all things was more of a "who do you believe" than anything else i think..i never watched the "E" re-creation or court tv..i only kept up on it via the 60 second soundbites on the nightly news..i really think the "mommie" screwed it up for the DA's office...she pissed off a whole lotta people by acting holier than thou about the whole thing..bitch is some kinda mom letting her kids stay w/that freak of nature as it is...there was no smoking gun, no dna from the kids sick shit like that..just hearsay and strange-ass behavior from a 42 year old man with a penchant for cosmetic surgery and wine. The only thing the DA suceeded in doing was sending ol mikie farther into debt..which kinda pisses me off..the lawyers got richer than god in this took what...almost two years to come to trial..lots of billable hours there was character assassination at it's finest on both sides of the table..but it proves one thing....if you get the best sleezy attorney at any cost..your luck improves wasn't about what he was about who you believed in the end..and never never snap your fingers at the jury box...
Sunday, June 12, 2005 | By: Unknown

Wealthiest Nations forgive $40 BILLION in debt..

its been a trippy week for moi..then i find this article..jesus..can't someone forgive my friggin paltry overdues?? huh?? come on dudes..I am only in the hole around 10k...but seriously, this is hopefully a good thing. Our own Fantastic Alice raised a question last week about countries that we loan money to and then they talk shit about us...hopefully that is NOT the case for these countries which are mostly located in Africa. The mighty "Group of 8", the name given the rich powerful countries that are owed this money are :Britain, Germany, France, Italy, Canada, Japan and Russia and of course the U.S. If your so inclined to read the actual article, the link is embedded in the title of the post.

Friday, June 10, 2005 | By: Unknown

Greetings from Sin City..

Actually, I just returned from two days in was interesting to say the least..

I was attending a concert at the Boulder Station weekly blues series at the Railhead, Joe Bonamassa was playing. Since I have a huge "thang" for his music it was a no "miss" event. I have a friend in San Diego that is also a Joe B. fan, Joanie who also attended the vegas show. Only problem was that Joanie showed up without a room reserved. This didnt seem to bother her however it drove me up a wall..I couldn't fathom not having somewhere to shit, shower and sleep for a 24 hour period...

So she informed me of this before her arrival..I pledged to fund a room for her within reason..the ball and chain was extremely uncomfortable with this idea..but so fucking what..i did it anyway..i had a small problem however, they had no vacancies at the Palace Station where we always stay..i was almost ready to call Motel 6 when the ball and chain got a case of "sorry for being a butthole"and used his extensive connections at the
Palace Station and they suddenly had a room, and at an excellent discount..cheaper than Motel 6..ta taaaaaaaaaaa the ball and chain came thru..god love him....

So I picked her up at the airport and delivered her to her room after walking the entire expanse of the "garden" room area around both pools..the place was a fucking maze...i stay in the tower..anyways..she says we can go hang with the band prior to the show at i say..i had no idea she was THAT tight with Joe B and the Band...

We go over 4 hours before the show and it was great to see the whole backstage thing, not to mention getting first pick of all the tables in the club (insert big ol smile here).

Joanie took pix's of me and the boys..they are boys compared to my tired old ass..and i spent alot of time talking to Joe's girlfriend who is also a music artist in her own right. Her name is Leah but i had a few wines and do not remember her last name..i must email Joanie and get Leah's last name and was fun playing a groupie for the night, and hearing some excellent blues upclose and personal.

Had to come back to Bakersfrigginfield today and go to work..fuck that sucked..a day and a half in vegas just aint long enough ya know what i mean?

but..i go back for Buddy Guy two weeks from today..(insert a cheshire cat smile here)and its a three day weekender...sometimes it good to be old and semi-retired :)
Monday, June 06, 2005 | By: Unknown

The Supreme Court rules against medicinal marijuana case.

ok....i am by no means saying people should have the right to get stoned whenever they want..what i am saying is that there is documented evidence that pot eases many symptoms and does not have toxic side effects like many of the traditional drugs..i can not take the traditional medication doctors prescribe for a disease known as can not be prescribed for individuals that have liver problems and for reasons that doctors have never fathomed I have a liver which does not function at full tilt..I never had hepititis C, i was never exposed to it....its just not a well oiled machine, my liver..anyways..many of the medications have toxicity problems for people that have liver problems so that limits me to what I can take for a very painful illness. Cancer, Glaucoma and AIDS patients all have documented uses for medicinal own Grandmother asked me for some before she died over 25 years ago. she died of liver cancer. it eased her symptoms from chemo and gave her an appetite. Doctors have known for well over 30 years that pot helps people deal with the side effects of chemo AND it slows down the effects of glaucoma.

I do not think the federal government should have the ability to supercede state law...its just plain wrong in most THIS case i know its wrong..everyone that they are busting is following the states guidelines perfectly. they DONOT sell pot to just anyone off the street. You have to have a state issued ID card which can only be gotten if your doctor prescribes pot for you. The doctors are not issuing these prescriptions without documentation of an existing condition. They require medical records. What gives the Feds the right to supercede state laws just because they dont like them? There are many state laws that are less rigid than federal law and up until now..the feds could only bust you in a state if you were on federal property within that the supreme court gives them the right to supercede the state laws anywhere in the state regardless of whether the individuals are totally obeying the state laws or not.

I will climb down off my soap box now...i said my piece..FUCK THE FEDS..
Friday, June 03, 2005 | By: Unknown

I love this one of him sitting in the sunlight..hes falling asleep sitting up! Posted by Hello

Scooter and Bobbie..Scooter is giving Bobbie a bath and its NOT something Bobbie was particularly fond of at the moment;Scooter had to hold him down for it..He cleaned him for 40 minutes.. Posted by Hello
Thursday, June 02, 2005 | By: Unknown

Baseball and other important things... is real slow when i have time to watch the National Spelling Bee..i shit you not..i really watched it this morning..i could of been working but hell..i went in around 11ish..only good thing about my job is that the hours are REALLY flexible..i can work anytime between 6am and midnight..anyways..i watched the NSB then went to work..

When i got home late back was killing me as usual...i attempted to eat a 16 oz bag of sour cream potato chips..and i dont even LIKE potato chips..

My padres were the nationally televised game tonight..i settled in to watch the "hottest" team in baseball at the moment play the other "hottest" team in baseball, the cubbies..who beat the ever-lovin shit outta my boyz..5-0..i get to see the padres maybe two or three times a month since i no longer live in San Diego..thanks you fuckers..really loved THAT game..but i did enjoy the game if for no other reason than it was MY boys on tv and they were playing at home..gratuitous shots of the san diego skyline at sunset ALWAYS make me smile.

Went through the twice daily ritual of medicating the feral kittens who actually are no longer feral..their mother still is..and frankly i think shes pissed that they perfer coming into the house than laying around the hot back of them a long haired calico has moved in..we called it bobbie until the realization hit me that most calicos are female..oh well..its still grown and formerly feral cat scooter loves bobbie and even lets him/her attempt to nurse..which is strange since scooter is a recently nuetered male..scooter gave him a full bath for 40 minutes to was a kodak moment so i broke out the digital camera..bobbie is only 5 maybe 6 weeks old and i am sure he misses his mom..he doesnt miss his siblings because he ignores them when they are inside for the daily medication times..bobbie also loves my dog sasha...follows her around like a little shadow..sasha could give a rat's ass bout bobbie..this doesnt seem to deter bobbie from pestering the hell out of sasha however..sasha is at least indifferent to bobbie..the fat old poodle nicky cant stand bobbie and lets him/her know every chance she gets..the old lab baby is patient w/bobbie and will on occasion give bobbie a big ol sloppy kiss plus lets bobbie snuggle up to her at night when its bedtime.

bobbie seems to have an aversion to the cat box..first cat i have ever had a problem with. this keeps us on high alert for possible kitten accidents and the ball and chain is none too happy about having to pay attention to anything other than the tv show he's watching. If bobbie makes a slight hesitant move someone is grabbing him/her and placing said cat in the cat box..which he will use if put there but he wont seek it out on his own. I have also noticed that he "squeeks" instead of meowing..

none of the above mentioned things are important in the overall scheme of life..but they are little pleasures that bring a smile to my tired face..they make my aching back ache a little less for the moment and thats a good thing. I would rather watch scooter bathe the kitten than watch the news. I would rather laugh at bobbie chasing sasha than get disgusted over the latest human death count in iraq, and i would rather watch the National Spelling Bee than go to work. I can't always do what i want..but when i feel i need a little escape from the reality of life i can always find it in the eyes of a kitten or the ecstacy of a child when they spell an impossible word correctly in front of god, their mom and the tv audience.

The Mayor's race in San Diego..what a collection of folks we got here..

San Diego's mayor,Dick Murphy quit recently..he says it was because of the magazine article that listed him as one of the worst mayors in the U.S....i say its because he has something to hide regarding the scandal regarding the city retirement fund. Bear in mind he "lost" the election in September to a write in, Donna Frye. Her win was overturned in court by Dick supporters...a majority of folks forgot to color in the damn dot and just wrote her name on the ballot..a faux paux that cost her the election.

Anyways..15 freaks submitted the 200 signatures needed to be considered for the election to be held July 26th. Now i am sure not all of them are freaks.. but i am sure that i could of gotten 200 signatures if i had merely sat outside my favorite Ocean Beach watering hole on a Friday and Saturday evening..the signatures will be verified of course prior to entering their names on the ballot.

San Diego is our nations 7th largest city. The woman, Frye, that won in september owns a surfboard shop and is currently on the board of supervisors. She ran a nice little campaign, stating that there is a veil of secrecy in City Hall and she wants everything done in public so we can avoid more messes like the pension fund fiasco which is now being investigated by the fed's..she had virtually no campaign funds and i swear to god she looks like an old hippie..i say this with pride since i too am an old hippie..her other big campaign shout was about the horrid state of the beaches in san diego..they are constantly being closed for sewage spills on a daily basis..she wants clean water..hey..dont we all?

Other leading candidates are Jerry Sanders, a Republican former police chief, and Steve Francis, a Republican businessman who has already pledged $500,000 of his own money. Nearly three dozen people had obtained nomination papers before the filing deadline at 5 p.m. PDT Friday, including a local Libertarian Party leader, a parking attendant, a bartender and a Harley-Davidson motorcycle dealer. Francis is a rich bastard whose war cry is about potholes..jesus christ..potholes..thats the best he can come up with?

Also filing for mayor on Friday was attorney Pat Shea, who helped guide Orange County out of its bankruptcy a decade ago. A former chairman of the Convention Center Corporation and ballpark task force, Shea is married to Diann Shipione, the whistleblower on the city's retirement board who left office March 31.
Six former members of the retirement board have been charged with felony conflict-of-interest in voting to keep shortchanging the system in return for increased benefits. Gee..thats a surprize..self interest in a government employee?

It used to be its "school officials"?

Lately i have noticed an alarming increase in arrests for child molesting by "school officials"..this can run the gamut from a teacher and/or coach all the way to the principal..perhaps its just bakersfrigginfield i thought..but no its not. I read news from various parts of the country and every single one of them has lately had such an arrest. I am just glad I do not have a child in school or else this trend would drive me up the proverbial wall..if you can not trust the individuals that teach our children and spend more time with them than WE do..who the hell can you trust?