Wednesday, February 01, 2006 | By: Dusty Taylor

Sports and the State of the Union.

First off..the SOTU address was a game for my son and myself. We took a shot of B&B (benedictine and brandy)every time those assholes gave the Shrub a standing Ovation...when only one side stood up (the Repubes) we only did half a shot..when both sides of the hall stood up we did a whole shot..this game is the only thing that kept me from shooting out the TV with the ball and chains cap gun..aka his teeny lil pistol.. I have no idea what caliber that damn thing is..but its the smallest friggin handgun I have ever seen, you can palm the sucker..

Football...ah yes..the Superbowl Xtra Large..actually its something I am looking forward to,seriously sportsfans..its gonna be a goodie I think..I hope anyway. I am rooting for the AFC of course, being an AFC kinda girl.So that means I am putting all my cashola on the Steelers..god help me if they lose..I lost my ass on ND's final game of the college season..so lets hope I don't do the same on the SBXL..one of the Steelers mouthy guys is a Bakersfieldian..Joey Porter..lol..no kidding..hes from Bakersfield..I love a guy that is dumb as a rock and runs his mouth like a friggin moron that took the short bus to school...which he could of done very easily here..I have never seen so many "handicapped" parking spots in my entire life..and they ALL are full at any given time during the day or night..Walmart has like 30..I shit you not..and they are always..ALWAYS..full up..no vacancies folks..whats that tell ya about Bakersfield? San Diego doesnt have half the spots for "sick, lame or lazy" folks that Bakersfield has..as a shopoholic I can swear to this fact.

OH..T.O is still in the news..Donovan McNabb has called T.O's rants and ravings tantamount to a "black on black"crime..I just call T.O's rants a felony-dumb A'hole's POV. We should all love "ourselves" as much as T.O. loves hisself..if you want to read McNabbs latest..its here.

A couple of the fired coaches have found jobs.Tice will be working for Jack DelRio's Jag's as an assistant..and Mike Martz will be the Offensive Coordinator for..lord..the Detroit franchise..he must really need a freaking job to take THAT one..

This just in to the newscenter..Lynn Swann has locked up the Repube nomination for Penn's governor..hey..I cant say a thing..we got Ahnold for gods sake, who has as much experience as Swannie at running a state...or anything for that matter. God help those folks in Pennsylvania if he's elected.

The NFL has stated it will give $20 Million to fix up the Superdome..as long as its in time for the Saints to play next season..I wouldnt hold my breath on THAT happening..they still haven't cleared the ruins from the residential 'hoods yet. If you want to read that story..the link is here. The estimated cost to repair the Superdome is roughly...drumroll please..$140 Million large..for some reason FEMA is expected to pay a portion of that..why I dont know.FEMA cant even get the residents back to their homes..but I digress..

On the Baseball front..the Astro's filed an insurance claim on what is owed to Jeff Bagwell for next season..a paltry $17 MILLION... Bags had surgury last season on his torn up shoulder and according to the GM for the 'Stros, Bags is no where near ready to play ball, and MIGHT never be..Its gonna get ugly sportsfans..mark my words..Bags says he's showing up to spring training and two doctors have said he is not able to play, his shoulder is still hosed up and probably will be forever. The 'Stros can write off 15 Mil of whats due Bags if the Insurance company coughs up the cash..stay tuned..this is far from over and could get ugly..His contract is ...ahem.. GUARANTEED..hence the sprint to the insurance company by the 'Stros.

And from the "I can't believe this shit" department..the Padres have hired the recently fired Phillies GM Ed Wade as a scout..umm...correct me if I am wrong but...the man couldnt find his ass w/both hands with regard to talent in Philly..why the hell would he be worth the gunpowder to blow him to hell for the Padres? Are the Padres like the Salvation Army of baseball for gods sake? I mean really..first Piazza, now a shitty GM as a talent scout..spare me the pain and agony John Moores' and Kevin "fucknut" Towers...please..pretty please with a 40-homer slugger on top..wtf is Sandy Alderson doing...sitting on his fucking hands or playing pocket pool?

I am done..have a good Thursday..or try anyway..

3 people gave us their .02 cents:

The Zombieslayer said...

Firsties!

Lynn Swann a Republican? Heh. If he's a real one and not a neo-con, that's awesome. Hopefully he won't be another neo-con.

Seahawks, baby! Or at least I hope. I hate the Steelers almost as much as I hate the Cowboys. I even rooted for the Broncos over the Steelers. That's how much I hate the Steelers. Plus, always will have a soft spot for Mr. Holmgren. He got Lombardi Trophy #3 to the Packers.

Bruce said...

I'm surprised Bags is putting up such a fight. Why would he want to play where he's not wanted anymore? Although, I guess the Astros could've been a little more diplomatic about it...

BTW...start checking your messenger; you never know who might be online ;)

An80sNut said...

You didn't wake up hung over with all those shots? I heard there were something like 61 ovations.