Our Fuckwit of the week-Papelbon

Seriously..is this man retarded?

The World Series ball is gone, and Jonathan Papelbon has an excuse: My dog ate it. The Red Sox closer insists it happened to the souvenir from the final out of Boston's sweep this year.

Really, Papelbon blamed it on his bulldog, Boss.

"He plays with baseballs like they are his toys," Papelbon told the Hattiesburg (Mississippi) American. "He jumped up one day on the counter and snatched it. He likes rawhide. He tore that thing to pieces. Nobody knows that. I'll keep what's left of it."

No one ever said you have to have an ounce of intelligence to be a pitcher..

From our WTF dept:Our Darwin award winner of the week..

No, the pic has nothing to do with the article
From Reuters:

One dead, one injured in pet rescue

CANBERRA (Reuters) - One man was killed and another was then seriously injured when they tried to climb a tree at night to recapture a pet cockatoo in Australia. The bird's 72-year-old owner fell as he tried to recover the pet in the country town of Bendigo in southern Victoria state. He was taken to hospital for treatment, police said. The injured man's neighbor, 58, then took over the rescue, but he also fell and died instantly when he hit the ground. "This was just an unfortunate accident," Bendigo Police Sergeant Peter Gilmore told Australian Broadcasting Corp radio.

Sorry, but I just don't get it. Birds fly..wtf did these morons think the bird would do when approached?

Michael Vick should get this sentence..

From MSNBC:

Tossing dog off balcony gets man 3 years in jail
S.C. man apologizes for injuring puppy during fight with girlfriend

CHARLESTON, S.C. - An incredulous judge sentenced a man to three years in prison for tossing a 10-week-old puppy off an apartment balcony during an argument with his girlfriend.

The Yorkiepoo, a cross between a Yorkshire terrier and a poodle, was in a soft-sided container but suffered head injuries and had to be put to death.

Javon Patrick Morris, 22, apologized for throwing the puppy off the third-floor balcony last March and pleaded guilty to animal cruelty.

"You mean he threw a helpless animal off three floors because he was mad at someone?" Circuit Judge Edward Cottingham asked a prosecutor before issuing the sentence Thursday.

The judge, who has owned nine dogs, said he was obligated to issue a tough sentence.

"There is nobody in this world that can understand that," Cottingham said.

He sentenced Morris to five years, suspended to three years in prison and two years of probation. Morris, who will be eligible for parole in 20 months, also was ordered to get anger management counseling.

"I've got to send a message to all dog lovers that we are going to protect that interest in our courtrooms," Cottingham said.

Vick will most likely get year at the most for his involvement in killing, training and fighting dogs..he will however face a state trial as well..so there is hope he will lanquish in jail a bit longer..

Fenway park and me.

I am in a lot of fucking pain today, its dreary,cold,windy and rainy. I have spent most of my day in and out of bed under the influence of some very powerful pain and muscle relaxer type pills, since I also got 3 epidurals this morning..its been one helluva day...

My knees hurt too. They aren't part of my usual pain ritual. Its my back with its missing discs and my hip...but I digress...

I remembered the last time my knees hurt that bad. It was mid 70's, I lived in Boston, the Fenway area to be exact..its known as The Fen's to the locals as I recall. In the winter I developed a condition in my knees known as Clondromaylasia Pitella. Or some fucking shit..anyway..

In the drark and horrid New England winters you go for weeks without seeing the fucking sun. It sucks moose balls. I couldn't work, I wouldn't walk and going to the shitter presented its own problems. So I sat in the dark usually medicated up to my brown eyes, and I stared at Fenway Park..in all its glorious splendor. I was in the highest bldg around, the top floor, corner apt and fucking awesome.

There were no other buildings between me and the BallPark and there I was on the 8th floor. The distance was about a quarter of a mile and it overlooked the actual park ofthe original Fenway Park..its was small,with a french-looking arch, don't get excited. I could hear the crowds and the crack of the bat, I could also see just a wee part of the inside of the ball park as well. I remember staring at the giant Gasoline sign, i forget the brand, I AM medicate remember.. I loved it in the summer, I always got goose bumps when I heard the crack of the bat and waited to see if it was the homeboys or the visitors, you could tell by the fans response of course. But again, I digress..hey its the meds ok?

SO, in the winter, it was dark and bleak, almost like the view was in black and white really. So I would spend sometimes hours looking at The ballpark. I would take pics, I would look thru the binoculars.



So I saw the view there in my minds eye today, and it seemed to take my mind off the pain, for that brief moment anyway. And it felt fucking awesome. The picture was so clear, it freaked me out.

The bathroom had the best view, figures eh? It was handtiled all the friggin way up the walls and including the floor.FUCKER was cold in the winter...radiator heat and all. But when the sound of the ball meeting the bat came through that room..it echoed around that cold little room...fuck I loved that sound. The crowd lifted my soul when it was one of the homeboys that hit it.

And so, I spent the afternoon tripping down memory lane, thanks to modern science and a great mind control thang going on. Because the drugs just take the edge of it. To make it go away, I went somewhere else.

I loved it.

Nascar's Drive for Diversity program is bullshit.

According to a father who's son was in the program it is..which shouldn't surprise anyone. I mean..come one..redneck racing is and always will be just that..rednecks. Their fan base might expand..and lately, contract..but the drivers, pit crews and assorted wingnuts at Nascar will always be lily fucking white. In the three years the program has been in existance..not one of the "minority" drivers have moved up into either of the three Nascar formats: Truck, Busch or Cup racing..From the NYT article:

"And now the father of an African-American stock-car driver once called a top racing prospect said the highly publicized Nascar-supported program was a failure. Joe Henderson Jr. said his son, Joe III, was under contract to MB2 Motorsports from 2005 to 2006 and was used for publicity but was given poor equipment in 2005 and not even provided a racecar in 2006."

To make it even worse..Nascar doesn't protect these minorities. Once instance, cited in the article, has 100 fans flaming a 16 yr old black driver. What else reeks of donkey piss is that Nascar uses these guys to promote them..as in..Lookee here! See, here's a negro that's racing..ain't we cool, we ain't prejudiced!

I call bullshit on this 4 year old program and the fuckwits running it. I think some rich white guys are pocketing some of the cash and I wouldn't be surprised if more comes out about this as the stockcar year progresses.

As I always say: You can take the redneck out of the hollar, but you can't take the hollar out of the redneck.

For those of you that don't have a clue what a friggin' hollar is..check out Coal Miner's Daughter, ok?